Mitch picked me up on my casual use of the term ‘zotted’ which prompted me to post this small fictional except in response:
Field Journal Entry #1623
The life of the tribe continues on in its usual fashion. One can spend most days just peacefully watching the tribe members graze and frolic across the tundra, munching upon the various berries and nuts that they find along the way and retiring to the dappled shade of the Jacaranda trees when it all gets a little too warm.
In a light-hearted move, I have started giving nicknames to some of the more prominent members of the tribe. One of the more senior members of the tribe with the odd patterning of hair and the surprising squawk, I have decided to refer to as “Richard” whilst the one who’s been attempting to lure ants out of their hive with a complex rigging of twigs, leaves and tree sap over the last week, I have named “Paul”.
My continuing attempts to communicate have been progressing well for the most part but there have one or two occasions where my grasp of the local dialect has let me down.
Their complex and intricate use of the word “seek-well” still confuses and delights me. Sometimes it’s used as a noun (as in “I’m feeling rather constipated. Please pass the seek-well”) and sometimes it’s used as an adjective (as in “You know you’re a complete seek-well head sometimes”).
As noted in previous entries, my use of the word “discombobulated” has ceased given the worried and fearful looks it tends to be greeted with upon its use. “Zotted” has also been tentatively added to this list as it seems to evoke some sort of discord amongst the group.
It looks like the tribe is preparing to cross back across the much feared “Enterprisey” river this evening so I better get started packing up my camping equipment.
Those secret moments in dark alleys
We were all curious about how Jason and Richard had reached their agreement over the use of the name ‘Code Assassin’. I thought it may have gone something like the following…
He looked nervously looked around.
The most dangerous alley off the most dangerous street in the middle of the most dangerous suburb at the scariest time of the night… and he didn’t haven’t time to change out of his brightly coloured Clogging Enthusiasts Dance costume (with matching brightly coloured kilt and knee high stockings) before coming here.
The wind hurtled down the small dark alley at a painfully quick pace across Richard’s exposed thighs.
“Damn it. Where is he!?” wailed Richard against the cold night air.
“You called?” a low murmur rumbled from behind him.
Richard jumped and spun around to see a black suited figure hanging upside down from a cable at face height.
“Don’t do that!” berated Richard as he patted his own chest area idly checking for a continued heartbeat.
The hooded upside figure grumbled wearily in response “You said you wanted to do business?”
“Yes,” Richard continued with a small revealing break in his voice “I want to use the name of ‘Code Assassin… at
least in front of my work colleagues… you know… to impress them.”
“I see” replied the hooded figure in a slow deliberate tone.
It seemed like an eternity to Richard before the hooded figure spoke again.
It seemed like an eternity to Richard before the hooded figure spoke again.
“You may use the name… but…” the figure said in commanding tones in an attempt to settle the now enthusiastically bouncy Richard from running off down the alley prematurely “there are three conditions.”
“Oh?” Richard gulped.
“First, you must never wear to attempt to wear an outfit that looks like mine” said the mysterious figure as his waved his hand across his tight fitting black rubber garb.
Richard pouted but nodded in reluctant acceptance.
Richard pouted but nodded in reluctant acceptance.
“Secondly, you must never ever ask for the ‘Super combo with chips’ down at Jimmy’s Bar and Grill on Harrison Street.”
“Umm…. Okay… Why? Is Jimmy’s a front for some amazing super hero hide out? Does asking for a Super Combo reveal some amazing fold out flip beeping buzzing elevator down to the centre of the earth?” enquired Richard excitedly.
“No,” came the response “It’s just a really bad deal. That much for a grizzled piece of meat and some chips? Seriously bad value.”
“Oh” Richard replied with a dejected slump “…and the third?”
“That you help me down from here. It’s starting to cut off the circulation to my legs.”
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